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What is a Doula?The essence of a Doula is to provide confidential, non-judgmental, non-medical support and care to individuals and families before, during, or after times of critical, transformative life change. -Provide emotional, physical, spiritual, and practical support.
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Why would someone seek a Doula?Doulas can become involved when a person wants to get tasks completed. They can help plan for future needs or help get "projects" done. Doulas are resource experts, helping clients make the most of resources and services. Doulas can serve anyone at any stage in their life, including those who may be near the end of their life. It can be overwhelming to care for someone who is very sick or ill and as illness advances, needs become greater. Studies have shown that the effects on caregivers are profound — physically, emotionally, and socially. Hospice care, while extremely helpful, is frequently not initiated until the last few days or weeks, and members of the hospice team are limited in the amount of time they can spend with patients and families. There is where a doula can help.
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How long should I have a Doula?Engagement with a Doula may last from a few days to a few months, based on either choice or circumstance. We seek to support our clients for the time that feels most appropriate to them. There is no specific timeline or limitation as long as the requests are within the scope our services.
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Does a Doula substitute for a medical or other healthcare provider?A Doula should not be a substitute for a medical or other type of healthcare provider. Doulas are not licensed to provide medical advice or perform any medical services. If requested, we may be able to offer assistance to a client or family in deciding what questions to ask of the medical provider(s) or offer information based on past experiences, but we will not make medical recommendations or decisions.
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Can a Doula be present at the time of death?Yes, each circumstance is different and our involvement during each stage of the dying process will be considered according to the wishes of the client, and family, as much as is feasible. As it can be nearly impossible to know exactly when a loved one will leave this physical life, it is difficult to commit to be presence for one’s last breath, however based on our client’s wishes we will do our best to be present, if requested.
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Does a Doula’s service end at the time of death?If requested by the client, our services can include involvement after death as a family transitions to the grieving process, but it is ultimately dependent on the wishes of the client. Check-in conversations are opportunities for the family to process their experiences in the weeks after the initial loss occurs. We may offer reflections as well as resources to assist the family over the coming months.
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Will a Doula help facilitate decision-making or mediate family disputes?Our primary focus and responsibility is to help ensure that our client’s wishes are acknowledged and honored as much as possible. We will not become involved in any conflicts regarding medical or financial decisions among family members. We can help create space for a conversation to take place between our client and a family member(s), however we will be unable to serve as a mediator.
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Will a Doula provide grief counseling?Grieving is complex with many emotions, memories, and thoughts to be processed. Specialized grief counselors are best equipped to support individuals and families through this process, which may be longer term. We are available and open to listening to the family’s experiences in the immediate weeks before and after death and then offering referrals, as appropriate. While we have experience with death and dying and the grief that follows, we are not grief counselors.
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What is a Legacy Project?A Legacy Project is an outward and concrete artifact or process that helps connect the family with the dying person after their passing. Depending on the circumstances, a Legacy Project may be designed by the client and/or their family before death or just by the family after death. Generally, a Legacy Project strives to express meaning, improve emotional connection, and honor the dying person’s life, legacy, and contributions. Examples of projects may include: a memory box, letters to/from the dying person, a quilt, a community performance, video, or a recipe book, however your imagination is your only limitation.
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Can a Doula help me make final arrangements for my loved one?Yes, we can assist with helping you make final arrangements for a loved one. We can also provide resources and serve as a sounding board for the family in helping them to understand the wishes of a loved one. Ideally, we have time to envision the atmosphere you desire before a critical, transformative life change and we carry out a plan you craft that brings you the most comfort and ease, but that’s not always possible.
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